The definition used of epiphany is : an intuitive grasp of reality through something (as an event), usually simple and sticking–so says Mr. Webster and the unsung typists who helped him.
My entire life, it sometimes seems, has been based on intuition. I wait for it. Bright ideas based on intuition have led me down many a garden path. But, no complaints here, my life has been varied and beautiful.
Now, strident voices and painful realities are at the door after the November Elections and especially after the argument over “my crowd is bigger than your crowd” inauguration. Really?
My friends gathered at least a thousand dollars of items for the homeless in Denver and delivered them on inauguration day to spend their time in a more productive way than watching an administration come to power for whom they did not vote. The day after, several women in my circle went to DC for the march and another several groups went to downtown Denver to show their concern for women’s and children issues. The photos from all over the world were amazing, especially for the ones of us who have marched to protest before much world-wide coverage.
My support is with the loyal opposition, but my brain and heart have not connected into what plan I need for myself–until yesterday.
Let me start at the beginning of the day. As you elders know, if you have Medicare you have one free physical each year. Yesterday was my day and at 10:10 am my nurse practitioner, Kate, saw me to make sure I was still kicking. She had mentioned a few months ago when she was doing a routine check of blood pressure, that mental health issues due to election hysteria were almost overwhelming the practice. Yesterday she said the same thing, but in spades. They are referring people to therapy, meditation class, yoga, giving light/short doses of calming drugs and generally just listening to the populations that feel vulnerable. I told her my dilemma about not being sure where my skills should be put and she said, take your time to center yourself and then move forward.
My next stop was to see the staff and Colorado Free University to sign up for a class, and my friend Mary Jean and I were chatting about my opposition to programs that would hurt the refugee family where we had served as cultural mentors. She said the same thing. Wait until you are sure you know how you want to spend your energy. She knows I love to teach, but what and how can this be handled in a group of adults without shouting?
The last stop of the day was the book club at my local library. The book we read was, The Handmaid’s Tale, by Margaret Atwood. Every woman in the room had spent a personal life time of insuring women’s rights and reading this particular book, put the fear of the circles of hell in our minds. Story after story from the various generations in the room of sexual harassment, rape, credit denial after divorce or widowhood, lack of freedom of reproductive rights and fathers and grandfathers and husbands who would not ALLOW them to thrive a human beings. They all have a similar situation now as I do–what can I do, how can I accomplish something and what do I let go?
For me to get to that point will require some quiet time, a spiritual search of myself and my options. Reflection on history, both mine and the various categories of the groups impacted by the change, moving the intuition to the formulation of a workable idea, and a support system of friends.
I can start with listing on paper the feelings I have, the angst that is around me and asking some of the elders around me for advice. The people in my age group have seen huge social changes all of our lives, but also know that the work for equality that was so hard-won. can slip away too quickly with out us paying attention.
A few weeks from now, a plan will be shared with you all and your imput will be appreciated. Until then the blog will give you some quotes or stories to keep us going until we know where we are going.
One last item. When I was out today, I read on sign on a “strip” club that stated if you were wearing a “pussy” hat like some of the women in the world-wide march, they would charge you double the entrance fee…….that would make a great place to picket!